6 months in review

Wow. I didn't think I'd survive this long. Those first few months were crazy. Here's what I wrote early on:

Feb. 8th
"Well...they are here! Solstice Rae and Marlie Mae arrived after 5 short hours of labor on Jan. 19th around 1:30AM for Marlie via a natural, vaginal birth and then Solstice arrived via c-section about 4 hours later. So- they will be 3 weeks old tomorrow! And- no one told me how HARD this was going to be.

I'm a pretty good multi-tasker, pretty even keeled...but I've never spent so much time crying and feeling completely unstable. It's starting to even out now...I don't cry every day anymore. But- those postpartum hormones were nuts. I can't believe how difficult that was and then throw in the needs of the babies...it's been the most challenging time of our lives. Mike is here with me 24/7 because I am just now getting to the point where I can handle both girls at once for a few hours at a time. We came home from the hospital with no rest (roomed in with the babies) and have not had rest since god knows when. Last night we decided to sleep in shifts and each got 4-5 hours of sleep which was amazing, but lately it's been naps as we can and maybe 3-6 hours of sleep in a 24 hour period. It's hard to function like that.

We've also had breastfeeding issues relating to our infertility which is a bummer. I didn't read that women with PCOS sometimes had supply issues until after we had the girls home. But- I have a supply issue. We spent the last few weeks in complete disarray- I've been breastfeeding each baby for about 20 minutes, then pumping for 20 minutes while Mike gives the girls each a bottle. It's been incredibly difficult- especially when you factor in changing babies and calming fussy babies (luckily our babies are pretty mellow). It leaves about an hour and a half between each feeding...and since the girls each lost nearly 2 lbs since birth (yikes) we have had to keep them on a strict every 3 hour feeding schedule. So- there has been very little sleeping or eating or even bathroom-ing. I didn't realize it would be like this! It may sound stupid- but I just thought it would be more manageable. But anyways- milk supply has been too low. We have been working with a lactation consultant which has been a godsend...but unfortunately we haven't been able to build my supply. It's about 1/3rd of what it would need to be to keep up. So- I was very disappointed at first...but have come to terms with supplementing. I've decided to continue breastfeeding for now- mostly because I love it...but also for the health benefits. I just had this vision of breastfeeding my girls exclusively and it has been hard to accept a different option. I did have the option of taking medication to build my supply- but I just can't justify taking drugs just to avoid formula. The side effects put me off too. The drug is meant for diabetics and the main purpose is to empty the stomach and upper GI quicker. yuck. so- we are doing the formula thing. at least we know the girls will grow bigger and stronger. my two 5 pounders need to get big enough to fit in newborn clothes!

other than the craziness...there is the crazy happiness. and love. mike is absolutely smitten with his girls which makes me so happy. he is also the greatest father ever. i just am really trying to enjoy this time with them as little peanuts without desperately wanting to fast forward to sleeping through the night...but hey, we'll get there soon enough."

And just like that- they are 6 months old. Marlie has 2 teeth. The first one cut through about 3 weeks ago and the second one came about 1 week later. Since they cut through she has been much happier. I'll go into how adorable they are and how much in love I am in a later post. More to come!